Friday, April 1, 2016

April 2016: Easter is a Second New Year

Here's the top three big things I'm looking forward to in April:

Moving to Texas! 
I'm headed to Bryan to work at Texas A&M on the grounds crew.

Taking a break! 
I haven't had more than 11 days without schoolwork since last January. I really need this.

Adventure! 
This is the same as the first one, but I really love going somewhere new and letting it change me.

Speaking of things I love, I love Easter! I love the refocusing and re-centering it brings to my life. I observe all of Passion Week, in my own little way, and that has made a huge difference in how I think of Christ and the Atonement. By stretching out my joy and contemplation for a week, especially with it marking the end of Lent, I am prone to having deep insights into what's been going right, and what's been going wrong.

To really understand what's been going wrong and what's been going right, we're going on a little adventure, using Easter over the years as guideposts along the path;

2012: I was days away from starting my Mission, the biggest and scariest thing I'd ever done, and I couldn't have been more excited. I had done everything possible to prepare myself, and I was as ready as I ever could have been for it.

2013: I was a year into my Mission, and loving it! I was with some amazing Missionaries and Church people, and a lot was happening back home. My favorite sister got married, my favorite Seminary teacher passed on, and I was, for the first time in my life, really understanding the universal appeal of the Gospel of Jesus Christ.

2014: I had just gotten home, and my blog post makes it obvious that I was:
1. Sleep deprived thanks to my baby niece, and
2. Not sure what to do with my life next.
There was a generally hopeful tone in my words, but also a lot of confusion.

2015: There was no blog post from this time, but I remember it pretty vividly. The confusion had stacked up to the point that I was on three different antidepressants, and twice was not allowed to leave my therapist's office because he thought I would kill myself. It was a pretty dark time, but I hadn't even found the path that would lead to my darkest days.

2016: To say that there was a night-and-day change would be to shortchange the Atonement of Christ! Everything in my life got better, no more drugs, no more therapy, no more suicide, and a whole new lifestyle. In a way, I did kill myself; through Jesus Christ, the person I was died, and someone similar but different came out of the experience.

Easter is a Second New Year. We can all stop, catalog how well we've been using the Atonement, and decide that we'll change up a few things before Easter rolls around again. For me, it's dedication, the relentless pursuit of excellence that blasts through adversity and leaves a Hell-shaker standing where a weakling once was.

What are you going to do with your life?